Retirement: How I learned how to settle down and just relax, finally
I’ve been enjoying myself these days, not looking for work, helping out my family, and just taking out time to BE.
Thanks to modern medicine, my depressive episode has been beat back where it belongs (in the corner of my being that I don’t have time for right now. I’m sleeping pretty well, my anxiety is being kept at bay, and I’m ~45% less cranky than I was BZ (before Zoloft).
I’ve also seen some of my self-confidence return since taking my pills. I was fearful all the time, afraid to do things I used to take for granted–stuff I needed to take care of (like driving a family member’s car, dealing with issues like student loans, Medicare, paying bills, etc.). It’s kind of exciting for me, a renewal of sorts, to be taking care of my business again. Once I got past the knowledge that I
should could not be working right now, things started to fall into place.
I’m spending a lot of time in Bellevue, with my son and grandchildren, and that’s helped me also. Their support helps a lot. I’m also driving my family to and from school, play practice, and commuter buses. Add helping with household chores, and watching all kinds of t.v. shows with them! This helps me to feel that I am contributing something, and being a part of their daily lives. I’m no longer in charge of tilting at windmills (i.e., being a supervisor at a non-profit), but I’m giving of myself to people I love. That’s a huge boost for me, an accomplishment that I’m proud of. I’ve missed a lot over the years, because I was working, or home in a coma-like state after a tough week at work!
So–I’m relaxed, my mood is on a more even keel, and I am happy.
Nothing to sneeze at, right?
More to follow on my retirement days…